CarniVail

DAY 2

Today was Fat Tuesday… I’m thinking it had something to do with 8 inches of fresh snow.

I felt MUCH better today. Vail air in my lungs. Blue Sky Basin under my feet. Snow-capped mountains in my eyes. Happy, happy, happy.

Powder ups the ante. Makes skiing so much more fun. Makes the crashes better. I had my own personal yard sale today. I thought that I was launching a jump – but actually ended up plunging into a snow drift. I was waist high in powder … lost my ski … I laughed so hard.

Now I Know My A, B, C’s

DAY 1

Arapahoe Basin, Colorado

As a skier from NC, I was always amazed to hear that you could ski A-Basin in June.

Syl & Karen are here in Colorado for their annual ski trip. It’s really been a treat for me to have them here. See my home. Walk the streets of Boulder with me. Meet some of my friends. See my ski house. See my newly discovered trails on the mountains. I’ve always felt like it’s better to be with a local on vacation. I am a local. That still makes me smile.

A-Basin … POWDER DAY!!!!!! Lori skied with us today. WE had SO much fun. I really liked this mountain. Supposedly you can ski A-Basin into June. I see why. It’s on top of the world. I had two major crashes today. I have big crashes now. I am trying to get better. I ski crazy. I fall.

Oh yes… and I’m sick. I am deathly ill actually. My voice is gone. Not too sick to ski the steeps at A-Basin though.

Moving On

Every time I open my blog and read that last Bird Grasping a Thin Branch post ... I get depressed. Damn. I've been some kind of sad, huh?

WELL, there's a time and place for everything. I WISH I could say that the sad phase in me is over ... but OF COURSE it isn't ALL gone. Sad sneaks up and knocks on my door ... and I still invite him in ... and there we are ... together again ... ME & Sad... hanging out ... old friends.

Moving on is a process... and I'm working on it. I hate to admit it, but I'm still reading some self-help material (Susan ... go ahead ... chuckle away). My latest purchase from my favorite bookstore in the world (Boulder Bookstore on Pearl St.) is When Things Fall Apart by Pema Chodron.

"Instructions on mindfulness or emptiness or working with energy all point to the same thing: being right on the spot nails us. It nails us right to the point of time and space that we are in. When we stop there, and don't act out, don't repress, don't blame it on anybody else, and also don't blame it on ourselves, then we meet with an open-ended question that has no conceptual answer. We also encounter our heart. As one student so eloquently put it 'Buddha nature, cleverly disguised as fear, kicks our ass into being receptive.'"

I have been ACTING OUT. BIG TIME. I'm still doing it. I am reacting. Not being. Reacting. To being away from home. To being away from my family. To being away from Stephanie. To being hurt. To being scared. To being free. WOW ... now there's some admission. Hopefully, that means I'm progressing. Right? I still slip - frequently ... but I am slowly getting myself together and I have moments of true happiness.

I LOVE the fact that I drive to work every morning mesmerized by the Rocky Mountains . I SMILE EVERY DAY.

I LOVE my job.

I LOVE the ski house.

I LOVE the fact that I can ski EVERY weekend.

I LOVE when friends come to visit from NC.

I LOVE my friends that I have met here ... I truly love their hearts and don't know what I'd do without them.

I LOVE meeting new people.

I LOVE the fact that I do whatever I want... whenever I want ... with whomever I want.

I LOVE Colorado.

Happy is knocking more often these days. We hang out a lot on the ski slopes :)





Thank you for your thoughts and prayers.

Meanwhile, I'm going to continue skiing and loving where I am and loving the people around me and allowing them to love me. Nailed to the point in time and space where I am.